Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 8:39 pm Post subject: Help me write this ad for Louis. This is a good exercise.
Hello Friends,
Those of you that have met Louis know he has as much energy as about ten average people. That means he has about ten times the number of projects going at any time.
One of his ongoing projects is advertising this website. The more members the site attracts, the more people we will have to throw in their ideas, and everybody will learn more. Besides, it is just more fun with more people posting ideas.
We are not limited to auto shop owners and techs; we welcome anybody in any business. But since most of us are techs, I suggested writing a postcard, then giving ten copies of it to each tool truck that visits Louis' shop. He will also give them to every company he buys parts from. Tool trucks and parts trucks associate with techs and shop owners, so it makes sense.
So let's come up with ideas for the postcard. Remember, this is also a fun learning exercise for you to see how advertising really works. It also keeps me from lecturing all the time. So let's say 'thank you' to Louis, and write an ad for him.
Here is a start:
- Learn how to make money in auto repair.
- Discover how to attract and keep the best techs.
- Find out how to reduce comebacks.
- Don't spend money on an expensive management training seminar. Start by joining this free website instead.
- Learn the secrets of a profitable business from one of the best.
- New to owning a business? Learn what mistakes to avoid.
- The best ideas are free.
- Reduce the aggravation in your business and enjoy your work days more.
- Meet great people and discuss great ideas about small business.
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Notice these are not complete ideas, just initial thoughts. That is how you should begin writing all your advertising too, by simply writing down all ideas you have and asking other people to add their own.
So just put up any ideas you have, even if they are incomplete and rough. That's ok; we will discuss how to put them into really good shape.
Joined: 17 Aug 2007 Posts: 10 Location: Tuneresville NJ
Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 10:25 pm Post subject:
Now avalible to the public!
based on the ideas that saved a nations economy!
Learn the secrets to fine tune your small buisnes
* The magic words to hire the best techs!
* Learn how to write profitable postcards!
* Discover the code words that make customers love your shop!
* See for yourself how other top shops are making huge profits!
Join this free website now and turn your shop around to big profits.
Excellent, Fred. You did two things right. First, you actually put ideas down on paper, or into a computer; same thing. Once you begin a list of things to say in an ad, it becomes easier to add to the list as more ideas come to mind over the next few days. Ideas have to simmer, cook and develop, so to speak.
Second, you didn't make the common mistake of listing features, but skipped right to the benefits of the site. For shop advertising, as an example, customers don't know what the number of bays means, what a scan tool is much less a 'factory' one, what factory training is, or how the number of square feet in a building means anything to them. But we see those things listed in shop ads all the time.
But explaining the benefits of those things might make sense to a customer. So that is an old, crude way to formulate advertising: it is called 'features and benefits.' If you have to list things about your business, at least explain how they matter to a customer.
Now to polish a little: I think your ad overstated a few things. Of course we see that all the time in advertising, bragging and boasting. But we also tune out most advertising too, because of all the hype. How about this for a start:
Now available to the public!
Good, or we could say 'Now available to you.' Nobody thinks of himself as a public, but as an individual. So always write to an individual, b/c people read by themselves.
based on the ideas that saved a nations economy!
That's good the way it is. It certainly is true, and can be easily proved.
Learn the secrets to fine tune your small buisness
Also good. If it was common knowledge it couldn't be called a secret. Secret is also a powerful word to use in advertising.
* The magic words to hire the best techs!
Not true, and an overstatement, but a good try. What about "Learn how to write ads that attract the best techs."
* Learn how to write profitable postcards!
Kind of true, but we assume people automatically understand why postcards are better than letters. The line needs to be developed to make more sense.
* Discover the code words that make customers love your shop!
Strike that one out, but that's not a problem. The idea is to get as many ideas on paper as you can, because one idea, no matter how bad, can lead to another one which might be great. Simply go back a few days latter and weed out the poor ones. Paper is cheap, so list as many ideas as you can.
* See for yourself how other top shops are making huge profits!
That is exactly true, but sounds like hype. How can we make it a little more believable? Sometimes it is better to understate things, or to put them into numbers.
Join this free website now and turn your shop around to big profits.
Good starter idea. let's make it less dramatic, because it skips over all the work that has to be done.
Overall, that is a lot better than I expected to see from a first response. Anybody else want to chip in and help Fred and me with this, please? At least one idea, what this site means to you? Entertainment, food for thought, source of new ideas, meet other people?
You guys are getting good. But you had an unfair advantage, you all let Fred go first. I see words promising something, not words describing features of the site. You've got: Learn, get, evolve, discover, and find out. You use 'learn' more often than any other action word; so, who wants to say why that is???
Let's polish these a little, hope some other readers will chime in, and in a few days we will begin assembling the actual postcard.
* Learn from the successes, and mistakes, of many other business owners.
Learn from the successes and avoid the mistakes of other business owners like you.
* Get that second opinion you so often desire.
Good.
* Learn ways to reignite that fire you had for your business when you first opened the doors.
OK.
* Evolve into an employer people WANT to work for!
OK, but 'evolve' sounds like something bacteria do to turn into animals, or monkeys to turn into humans. Besides, evolution is a controversial subject, so let's not even conjure up any reference to it. How about:
Also, one of my lifetime goals happens to be this exact one, become the kind of person people want to work for. It is nice to see it is shared by others in the business.
* Experiencing "slow times"? Learn how to work to eliminate them!
Hits a sensitive point, for sure. Our shop is dead, and everybody says "It is normal, look at everybody else." Unfortunately, 'everybody else' is making the same mistakes we are, but Louis is booked a week in advance.
Learn how to increase the bottom line.
'Bottom line is a cliche.' You've heard the jokes: "If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, avoid cliches like the plague." The truth is, cliches make you look like an amateur to the reader, not clever.
Learn ways to increase your profits.
Discover why too many customers may put you of business.
I'm not sure what that means. Will the reader understand?
Learn proper pricing strategies.
OK. How about improving it: rather than proper, substitute... effective, profitable, modern, sophisticated.
Here is a tip: use a thersarus to give you ideas for more powerful key words.
Find out how to run your business instead of it running you.
Good. It uses a clever play on words that is clear, easy to grasp.
Discover why loss leaders are hurting your business and what to do about it.
Nice. Strong. Authoritive. But, we assume everybody knows what a loss leader is. If not, they will stop reading the ad right there.
Learn proven theory’s that will insure your business is profitable for years to come.
Ok, but use a thersarus to find better words for 'theory.'
Visit outofthecrisis.org: a place to interact with other shop owners to learn proven ways to make your business successful.
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 146 Location: Garden City, KS
Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 8:18 pm Post subject:
I like action words, like "learn", because I don't want to hint that you just register here and answers are handed to you. That is a lie. Honesty dictates we communicate that there is work involved in turning your business around, or just ironing out some wrinkles.
I like the word evolve, but I did steal it from Deming. "Improvements don't need to be revolutionary, evolutionary will suffice".
Thanks Bud! I like interactive topics. Now...how do we get more involvement? We have plenty of views. If you are reading this, don't fear: you will NOT be ridiculed or insulted. Later, Matt.
_________________ Matt Fanslow
ASE CMAT/L1
Crag-Technologies, Inc
www.wavehook.com
We do need more involvement. We sort of are paying in advance for it, by giving away so much professional insight into advertising here and into management on the Deming forum.
But people are shy by nature and don't like putting their thoughts into writing. Writing might seem like it is set in stone, whereas in conversation we can change our minds and not fear losing face.
Of course we don't care about any of that here. I think the site gets an average of 350 hits per day, with an average of 15 minutes of time spent on it by each visitor. In the web world that is a lot of time. People like what we like. So obviously they are reading us, just not speaking up.
Louis has me working on a survey, to just ask readers what they want or need in this site. That was my idea; marketing research. His idea, however, is to just keep on improving it until we hit it right; Deming's way.
Joined: 19 May 2007 Posts: 206 Location: Camp Verde, AZ
Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 10:01 pm Post subject:
Bud wrote:
Louis has me working on a survey, to just ask readers what they want or need in this site. That was my idea; marketing research. His idea, however, is to just keep on improving it until we hit it right; Deming's way.
Who is right?
This has the earmarks of a loaded question.
I am going to say both. In my opinion doing a survey is a way of finding what the customer (people that use the site) want. Then the ideas are implemented and the results tracked to see what works. I do not think Deming taught that we are to blindly try different things until we hit on the correct combination.
_________________ David Wittmayer
Owner / Manager
Hansen Enterprises Fleet Repair, LLC
Camp Verde, AZ
www.hefrshop.com
It's not a loaded question, although I wouldn't be suprised, among a bunch of techs.
Deming taught that surveys are of limited value, since people don't 'really' know what they want or need. For instance, they might have wanted better carburetors, not realizing that such a thing as fuel injection even existed.
The 10-minute drive-through oil change did not come about as the result of surveys, I think. Somebody finally just got the bright idea and introduced it.
I'll let Louis address this topic further, since he explains it better than I do.
To answer your statement, Dave, I agree with you: do both a survey but keep trying to offer new ideas anyway.
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